Soul Song Paralytic

by Saint Solitude

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    With artwork from Dara Lorenzo.

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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Soul Song Paralytic, Flux Camoufleurs, Volume I, A Crack in the Snow Mortar, By Some Great Storm, Contrary EP, Deliverance (single), Disaster Stories EP, and Journal of Retreat. , and , .

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1.
00:32
2.
take it outside, there’s no room here there’s no room for that here you can get by with just a morsel it’s not starvation, it’s what you do barely intact, i hold the pieces close to my chest to change the narrative the fallout is a mouthful you can’t swallow get along with photographs get along with photographs get along with photographs i am not stronger i am not stronger you went missing and i was pissing life away the strong man walks down these hallowed halls of pageantry you went missing and i was pissing life away the straw man balks at these plain displays woke up in a hologram nostalgia is never welcome in here shadows implied, but what i still need is to wear it on my sleeve get along with photographs get along with photographs get along with photographs i am not stronger i am not stronger you went missing and i was pissing life away the strong man walks down these hallowed halls of pageantry hand it over you’ve got to shoulder everything the secret lives that we can’t tap into and now i’ve found there’s secrets to find disparate ground thus combined now i’ve found
3.
trained defenses can’t deny what makes the sickness come alive absence feels inferior i take a cue from those who’ve been anesthetized, a second skin presence comes no easier patience is fading with all its implications important decisions take the proper provisions but certain divisions divide forever conversations with the dead fantasy belongs instead see the smoke and ash exterior patience is fading with all its implications important decisions take the proper provisions but certain divisions divide forever now it’s so clear it was only beginning the satellites broadcast this terrible ringing from every mountain i climbed patience is fading with all its implications important decisions take the proper provisions but certain divisions divide forever patience is fading with all its implications important decisions take the proper provisions but certain divisions divide forever
4.
04:44
egypt, sands have grown too cold egypt, magic has been sold she waits, lying in the rain she is wondering where you are see the beast, see, he’s been here all along waiting for us to close our eyes see the beast, see, he’s been here all along waiting for us to turn around you can’t hide the poison inside you you’ve got all these pictures I’m with you you can’t hide the poison inside you egypt, sands have grown too cold egypt, magic has been sold she waits, lying in the rain she is wondering where you’re from you can’t hide the poison inside you you’ve got all these pictures I’m with you you can’t hide the poison inside you
5.
begin with the first with the pleading in the verse the details redacted, but in a short while, refracted they’re unassailable, completely available you always had an inkling you always thought that when we got together, we’d sound like heroes, but so much better but i could not take the remnants from the wake counting like a Dickens debtor with the best idea of character i pause to break the barrier for a long time looming in the dark triangle check in with the satanists i’m borrowing a taste of this for a long time for a long time for a long time it’s a long time coming
6.
01:35
7.
you can’t remember cos you already knew the man made helpless you can’t remember cos you already knew at best I can only be a little more sure i feel a scar that’s growing over my eyes the dead and the living and now I see you’ve cast a terrible curse of maybes and why nots and what gives this season of leaving and now that it’s teasing we lost feeling the arrow there will take you anywhere i’ll stop healing the arrow’s never really out there at all but how can I relate to any of you with this between us? what would it feel to clear the calendars and clocks? i’m lost at sea and it’s hard to agree the words remain the same in every call “i cannot imagine” the unexpected and divided were there just waiting for contact ever since I left home ever since I went crawling back and gave up we lost feeling the arrow there will take you anywhere i’ll stop healing the arrow’s never really out there at all we lost feeling the arrow there will take you anywhere i’ll stop healing the arrow’s never really out there at all the arrow’s never really out there at all the arrow’s never really out there at all
8.
standing now, the keepers drown (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) standing now, the keepers drown (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) not gone to heaven (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) not gone to heaven (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) blind the body, test the crowd (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) what we discovered discarded now (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) no god, no heaven (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) no god, no heaven (the reaper’s found, the reaper’s found) as long as space the moments i have wasted some fear for that would only come up chasing you can’t get carried away the land recedes before I even touch down the moon has sank and Bloodport’s taken over you can’t get carried away details hover off the ground (he dropped the sound, he dropped the sound) cried turn to a desperate howl (he dropped the sound, he dropped the sound) no god, no heaven (he dropped the sound, he dropped the sound) no god, no heaven as long as space the moments i have wasted some fear for that would only come up chasing you can’t get carried away the land recedes before I even touch down the moon has sank and Bloodport’s taken over you can’t get carried away
9.
05:51
what is this place? and what is this in front of me? you look so tired and breathless but maybe you just finished laughing was that an old friend i saw on the way in? she couldn’t reach me from where I was standing unless i could admit entrapment yeah i’m defined by people iI do not see it’s right there in front of me without hearing without even noticing without hearing am i allowed to speak inside infinity? or can this be measured? whatever came before i’m not prepared for war or these sights that I’m seeing between the newly born and the freshly torn, ripped from the reaches with carnival features inside your favorite horrorscape where we imaginate and grasp at a meaning yeah i’m defined by people i do not see it’s right there in front of me without hearing without even noticing without hearing
10.
in the follow through and the in between, you come to see that the make believe is all you get when you multiply the impossible and unrecognized we’re infertile cos we’re not fully formed we’re infertile cos we’re not fully formed with the cascade flowers raining down from all directions the nearest kingdom i hear that echo, but only when there’s room to fall yeah we’re infertile cos we’re not fully formed here comes the background current and there goes the shorthand version and i can’t trust your instincts and i don’t understand your radio silence your radio silence we depart at sunset with comic timing to start the day in commiseration with every victory, the silver medals stacking up yeah we’re infertile cos we’re not fully formed here comes the background current and there goes the shorthand version and i can’t trust your instincts and i don’t understand your radio silence your radio silence your radio silence your radio silence your radio silence i refine my gestures to mark the absence in recognition of resignation undo inaction in vain attempts and agony
11.
can’t enter undecided throw out your peace or hide it it comes along and finds you i wonder how you faced it to talk so much then taste it you could’ve been so gracious it comes along and finds you it comes along and finds you carry on, my nemesis deliver me paralysis images an ankle’s width apart forever don vacation (such an abomination/no clearer validation) was this an aberration? (a routine mutilation/such an abomination) it comes along and finds you your sister could’ve helped you sort out this early curfew how could you keep this secret? how could you keep this secret? how could you keep this secret? how could you keep this secret? it comes along and finds you it comes along and finds you carry on, my nemesis deliver me paralysis images an ankle’s width apart
12.
02:48

about

Inspired by the loss of very close friends and family, Soul Song Paralytic is a musical-visual collaboration that brings together the musician Dup Crosson (Saint Solitude) and the visual artist Dara Lorenzo for a unique project exploring “grief, death, and other favorites."

"Drawing from and sublimating our personal losses into a complete musical album and visual exhibit, we hope to create a shared public space where mourning and all its facets can be on display with pride. We intend for these pieces to stand in stark contrast to a culture that shuns discussions about death, often fails to provide adequate tools for healing, and rewards individuals who rush through mourning or neglect it altogether. In the process, we hope to connect with those in mourning and encourage similar creative means of expressing the brutal emotional experiences found in loss.”

Saint Solitude’s contribution to the exhibit is its fifth full-length album, comprised of 12 songs that confront the minutiae of grieving and extrapolates Crosson’s personal experience to a broader paradigm: the single dream of a deceased friend turns into a question of how the dead define the living; the uniquely painful process of delivering a eulogy focuses instead on amassing an inventory of fond memories.

Crosson has persistently self-branded himself to be a songwriter in the pop realm (except Flux Camoufleurs, his flagrantly 2015 experimental collection of instrumentals). On SSP, though, these tendencies take a backseat to jagged rhythms, odd meters, and a conspicuous use of space. An idea of controlled chaos dominates the album’s mood with longer, darker, and stranger songs. Arrangements on cuts like “The Second Arrow” and “Plain Sight” draw more from late 90s trip hop than the project’s typical Sunny Day Real Estate and Radiohead comparisons, though splices of accessibility shine through on the lead single “Your Radio Silence” and the twinkling piano leads of “Egypt,” a song first written by Crosson’s friend Andy Campbell for whom the album was written.

Defiant in its efforts to be both vulnerable and aggressive, Soul Song Paralytic is an investigation into a paradox. What results is an album that, despite brooding deeply on the uncomfortable nexus of death, anxiety, and mortality, is full of life.

credits

released October 21, 2017

written, performed, and produced by Dup Crosson, except track 4 written by Andy Campbell and Dup Crosson and clarinet on track 11 performed by Beth Custer. track 12 contains a portion of "Oh, Freedom" (traditional). recorded by Dup Crosson at Stumble Abode and Sami Perez at Tiny Telephone SF/Oakland apr-sep 2017. additional field recordings by Dup Crosson.

mixed by Jose Ayerve at Mobile Womb, except tracks 7/10 by Andrew Schatzberg at Landslide Studio and 1/12 by Dup Crosson at Stumble Abode. mastered by Mark Alan Miller at Sonelab. art by Dara Lorenzo, layout by Dup Crosson.

for Andy, captive in lavender.

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about

Saint Solitude Oakland, California

Saint Solitude is the musical persona of Maine native Dup Crosson.

Depending on the day, or the song, Crosson alternates between the roles of loop artist, multi-instrumentalist, and perhaps most importantly, songwriter. He combines his favorite elements of Britpop, shoegaze, post-punk, and psychedelia into accessible and immediately appealing pop songs hereby known as BITTERSWEET FUZZ. ... more

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